FAQ, Update and Pictures and an OOPS!

   Well it's been 2 years so a lot has changed, I don't even know where to start. I guess I will start with FAQ, then my skin now (since it's why you are here) then personal life (because some of you are actually interested in it) and wrap it up with pictures (the other main reason you are here)

FAQ

1. What kind of rosacea do you have?

        I have pustule and papule rosacea (the gross kind) with broken capillaries in my face and even when my skin is clear and smooth I have a "healthy" pink glow. 

2. Do you still flush?

       Yes! I still have things that will still make me flush and make my face turn more red than normal or feel very hot. My personal triggers is heat number one, really spicy food, or me being very upset basically anything that gets my blood really pumping and makes it rush to my face.

3. What oils do you use and what brands do you use? 

         I use tea tree oil aka melaleuca oil that I get from Young Living only, if you would like to order some you can become a member by clicking HERE you don't have to buy a kit and there is no minimum order, they just have the best, purest oil that I have found and I defiantly saw a difference when I switched to their oils. Being a shameless self promoter if you do sign up could you please give them my member number and sign up under me so I can earn free oils member #1365808 THANKS! 

       As for my argan oil I get it from Mountain Rose Herbs just click HERE they have unrefined, cold pressed oil for the most reasonable prices and really good quality. I order all of my carrier oils and dried herbs from them, they are the best for carrier oils and dried herbs. 

4. What dilution or how do you mix your oils? 

       Well I started with a 8:1 ratio, meaning 8 parts argan oil to one part tea tree oil and slowly over 2 weeks I kept upping the tea tree oil until I had a even 1:1 mixture. I mixed my oils and then put them in it little roller bottle like this, make sure you use a metal roller or the oils will eventually breakdown the plastic ones, you can get metal roller fitments also on the Young Living website.

5. Why don't you just go to a dermatologist? 

    I have been to 6 different derms in 3 different states, they each put me on different expensive medications. I have taken oral medications, daily antibiotics, gels, creams, one doctor had his own concoction that he hand made of all of this crazy stuff I don't remember besides sulfur (it smelled), several rounds of laser treatments that cost a fortune, none if it worked, and it was all outrageously expensive. With insurance I was spending $150.00-200.00 a month, once I lost my insurance just ONE medication was $600, ONE. So I have been to dermatologist and did seek medical treatment but once they failed and I could no longer afford it I had to seek other options.

6. What do you think caused your rosacea and why did you end up using these oils?

    I think demodex mites caused my rosacea. Once I stopped using my prescribed meds (which didn't work all that well anyways) I did a TON of research and reading and that was my conclusion. It was my face and it was already bad so really I couldn't do much harm experimenting with different holistic remedies. I tried several different washes and products and this gave me the best results and was the least irritating to my sensitive skin. I know a lot of people want to use coconut oil but for me it left my skin too oily and I would have to blot it off, I wanted something that would absorb quickly and I could put makeup on right away if I wanted to, so I chose argan oil which is a "dry" oil if that makes any sense. Also when people have messaged me and said they were not having the same results they were using coconut oil and once they switched to argan they began to see a difference. I wrote a whole post on why I chose argan over other oils and it's medicinal properties and you can read it HERE

7. What do you use to moisturize your face?

   Well when I was just beginning my treatment I only used the argan and tea tree mixture and used raw Shea Butter for those extremely dry flaky patches. Now I make my own face moisturizer that contains tea tree oil and argan oil but it also contains other oils to help with fine lines and such (I've gotten fancy). Actually I make it for all of the women in my family and it's awesome.

8. What shampoo and soap do you use?

    At the beginning I used tea tree oil shampoo and conditioner by Natures Gate and I used Dr. Bronner's tea tree bar soap for my body. I've moved since then and it's hard to find it so if I don't feel like ordering it online I will just add some tea tree oil to my conditioner once and a while if I'm feeling itchy (itching or crawling feeling is my first sign that I'm going to wake up with a pustule or zit so I like to get ahead of it)

9. Can you tell me if I should do ______ or look at _______and tell me what to do?

    Sorry, I'm not a doctor and I don't claim to be, I initially started this blog for me to be able to follow my own progress and when I saw the changes and improvements I was seeing I thought I would share it with others in hopes that maybe it might help a person or two. Well now with about 150,000 page views and hundreds of people commenting or private messaging me telling me it worked for them I'm happy that I found the courage to embarrass the hell out of myself and put those pictures and my journey out there. But again, I'm in the medical field but I'm not a doctor or a dermatologist so I can't really recommend anything or diagnose you with anything, follow me at your own risk! 

10. Any other tips?

    Use good quality oils they really do make a difference, Make sure you go close to your lips or even over them, down your neck, up into your hairline a little bit because they will run to whatever area they can to get away from the oil, I remember my lips suddenly becoming a ring of P&P for a while and them running to my eyelashes and me having to rub a low tea tree oil dilution over my lashes and boy did that shit burn. (I DO NOT RECOMMEND THIS)

Okay if there are any other questions that you think I should add here leave it in the comments!

On to my skin!

   Lets see, good news is my face is still clear! If you get close up on it I still have some broken capillaries but the only thing that is going to fix that is laser treatments. Except for the random, one off papule or pustule I haven't had a breakout in YEARS and I get a pimple like once every six months if that. However I worked for a animal shelter and whenever we would get a dog with demodex mange I would start to breakout a bit and would have to use the 1:1 ratio for a week straight, other than that I'm not gonna lie I don't use my argan oil and tea tree oil mixture all that often, maybe once a week or every two weeks, but I do use a homemade face cream that contains tea tree oil along with other oils. If my face starts to itch I will use my 1:1 high dilution tea tree oil/argan oil mixture but that is about the only time. I don't use the tea tree oil shampoo and conditioner any more because its hard to get around where I live now (I moved, that is in the next update section) I will however add some tea tree oil to my conditioner if my head feels itchy and I still use tea tree oil soap, either one I have made (I've really gotten into making my own beauty products) or if I'm lazy I will add a few drops to my liquid body soap that I buy (which has been more frequent since I moved). So that is about it on the rosacea end, I can't really think of anything else because I haven't had to deal with a breakout in so long and everything else is so routine I don't think about it much. 

   Let's Get Personal

Well let's see, I think I was jobless or working as a doula and I was a midwifery student last time I posted and I am no longer either of those things. In late 2014 I had a bit of a mental "breakdown" and was diagnosed as bipolar. To go further back I was originally diagnosed in 2003 but I decided I didn't like that diagnosis or the meds so I was just going to insist I had depression and go with that. It worked for a good while kinda. I was on a high dose antidepressant for a little over 10 years and it kept me kind of stable, looking back now I can really point out times when I wasn't but it was just kind of brushed off as me being flaky or irresponsible, or stubborn or selfish and just slightly weird and antisocial but now I can see it as very mild manic episodes. When I lost my insurance that covered my rosacea meds, I lost my insurance that covered my antidepressants too and after a while I just couldn't afford them and slowly weaned myself off of them. In my mind maybe I wasn't depressed anymore and didn't need them anyways, I mean it had been 10 years. BIG MISTAKE. Bipolar raised it's ugly head and destroyed my life. 

When I say bipolar destroyed my life I mean it killed every dream I had, because of bipolar I can no longer work as a doula and I will never get to become a midwife. When my bipolar decided to make its appearance I still had no insurance which really left me...in the simplest words, fucked. Thank you America for not having universal healthcare! With out insurance I had to go through free clinics that I could find and it took me 6 months to be seen by a psychiatrist and get on medications and almost a year to get my meds right. One year that I battled daily with my mind, one year of some days feeling, acting and I'm sure been mistaken for a crackhead and other days being so low that I couldn't even muster the energy to shower, eat or answer yes or no questions, one year of thinking about saying fuck it all this misery and thinking to myself that me and my love ones who had to care for me would be better off without me, one year of hell. I started a blog about it and I had let it go once things kinda got on the up swing but I still have bipolar issues, I always will, I will either simply have bad days or my medications will simply stop working (this has already happened) or some days I just feel like educating and trying to remove the stigma of mental illness and will go write so if you want to learn more about that part of my life click My Jagged Mind and go read it. Not much there right now but I am going to start using it more, writing is very therapeutic for me. On to the happy things!

So, after all of that craziness I finally got my life together for the most part. I am mentally stable except for a day here or there every few months, I was able to get a job that I LOVED working at a animal shelter and life was simple and I felt it was probably the best it was going to get for me. I was wrong, it got better. You see there was this boy that I met and fell in love with at the age of 15 and like most teenage romances we didn't last, not due to lack of love but because life likes to throw curve balls at you and for reasons beyond our control he was forced to move out of state, back to his home state and we lost touch. Well being that this happened in 1995 and I don't think I had ever even heard of the internet I figured he was gone forever. Fast-forward to 2012 and Facebook! I found my lost boy but when I did he appeared to have several small children and what appeared to be a wife so I simply sent a message saying "HI" and wondering if he remembered me and asked how his life turned out, sadly I never got a response.....not until May of 2016 at 5 am. I was sleeping when my phone started getting so many messages it vibrated off the table, he had somehow never seen my message until that morning and one of his first messages was he had been looking for me for 20 years and could he drive down to see me that night. 6 months later I moved up to be with him and we have been living together in the Midwest, with him having custody of his children since October of 2016 and life is pretty damn great. 

The only thing in my life that I am unhappy with is my job which I am trying to remedy and now that midwifery and being a doula is off the table I'm kinda lost as to what I want to do. Right now I work at a hospital in a big city in a department that I get to see all kinds of cool, interesting and gross things but I miss working with animals and want to see if I can somehow get back to that. other than that I am probably the happiest I have ever been with my life and where I am at in it. Yeah for finding lost love! But being a "stepmom" is challenging and scary as hell, I'm not even gonna lie, but I really didn't know I could love someone else's kids as much as I do these two. Again if you want more ramblings of my life and bipolar click My Jagged Mind , I will probably get like 3 views LOL.

The only other thing that I want to add to this because I think it might be of interest to some is I now  have an addiction to oils. I had a friend who tried to "sell" me on this whole essential oil crazy when I was in midwifery school probably back in 2012 and I was having none of it, I especially wasn't spending like $150. bucks on some kit that had oils that I had no idea how to use and a diffuser, I mean what the hell was that anyways? No thanks. Then I lost my insurance and well you know the rest and once I found out how great tea tree oil worked from my rosacea I bought the damn kit, studied up on oils and basically replaced my medicine cabinet with mostly oils. I still use some medicine if needed but I go to my oils first and if they don't work, I mean I carry a bag of my "essential, essentials" with me at all times. Peppermint for headaches, Lavender for cuts and insect bites, Lemongrass as an insect repellent, Tea Tree for just about anything skin wise, Peace and Calming so I don't smack a bitch at times and Stress Away when I'm about to have a panic attack because I take enough meds with my bipolar I don't want to take a xanax unless absolutely necessary, En-R-Gee for days I'm dragging ass and I could go on and on. For real I was the biggest skeptic who was ready to end a friendship over her non stop babbling about her "Oils" to having one change my life and the others change my way of living. 

OOPS!

As for the OOPS, I accidental deleted like 200 comments, SORRY, it was a compete accident I thought I was just deleting them from my comments folder not off the blog itself. Please keep commenting, I love it and I try to respond to everyone especially if you have questions. Really sorry! 

Okay now that we have finished the first chapter of my future biography onto the pictures! 

PHOTOS! SO EXCITING, SO NARCISSISTIC!

October 2015 Oregon Coast

My mom and I, No makeup except brows (I have a thing for brows)

July 2016

My boyfriend and I just powder on my face

February 2017
Boyfriend and I, Just powder on my face

February 2017

 Eye makeup and Powder 

June 2017

No Make up in either picture 

July 2017 

Just Powder, you can see the one zit I get like every 6 months

                   

                                              

                                             

                                                                           Current hair color

                                                           Powder on my face and eye makeup

An apology, update with pictures and news about oils

Hi everyone!

So it's been over 2 years since I started this journey and this blog and it's been a while since I posted pictures so I figured it was time. I also wanted to apologize to those that emailed me and I didn't get back to you until recently. I feel HORRIBLE about that but for some reason my email was not forwarding like it was suppose to so I just received a bunch today that I replied to, I'm really sorry. I'm actually going to post my business email below for people to email me that way I am sure to get your questions and messages and I can reply in a timely manner. Again, I'm SO sorry about that. I don't check this page as often as I used to, I'm sorry about that too, but I try to check it every other month or so to answer questions and such.

 I am going to do a updated FAQ post soon and I hope to answer some questions more detailed. If you have a question or think of anything that I should cover in a FAQ post please leave it in the comments or email me. I've also had a lot of people ask if I would be willing to pre-mix oils and sell them or make starter kits with the products I use and it is something I am considering. I have a Etsy page where I sell my handmade jewelry and my oil diffuser jewelry so if I do decide to sell premixed oils or starter kits it will be on there. If you are just curious and want to check out my jewelry (or buy some!) my store is called Formed From Fire and you can find it  HERE! I hand make everything on there and I'm always making and posting new pieces. Spread the word, or buy something, it's really pretty! You can also follow my jewelry business Instagram here ;)
(Sorry for the shameless self promoting, but it's my blog so I'm allowed)

Okay on to the update, far as my face routine, not much has changed, I still use the argan and tea tree oil mixture almost daily. I don't really "wash" my face, I use those makeup remover clothes sometimes or tea tree oil face soap if needed but most of the time just some water and my oils. I don't wear a lot of makeup so I can get away with not using a lot of chemicals to clean my face as I try to put as few chemicals on my skin as possible. I haven't had a pustule or a pimple in a long time now and if I do get a pimple it's usually hormonal related. I now put my oils in a little bottle with a roller on top and I'm able to roll it on my face but other than that it's the same.

I'm not sure if I ever mentioned this (pretty sure I have) but about a year before starting this journey and this blog one of the many things I had tried was laser treatments. While they did nothing to help the p&p and dry skin it did get rid of some of the redness that was due to burst capillaries. When I had it done the dermatologist told me that I would have to have it done every few years and I'm getting close to that time again as I can see the broken capillaries. Unfortunately laser treatments are expensive so that won't be happening for a long time unless I find a fairy godmother wishing to bestow laser treatments to me lol.

 As you can see in the pictures my face is pink and it always will be but I can live with that, light makeup covers it easily. If I get warm face flushes pretty easily and can become pretty red if I'm really hot which is awesome since I live in the hot and humid city of New Orleans. I think a lot of it just has to do with the fact that I have very fair skin and my capillaries are close to the surface. It is what it is. My face is million times better than it once was. It's almost crazy to look back at how bad it was now that I'm here. I battled with my face for about 10 years and if you would have told me I would ever be at a place with a clear, but slightly pink complexion without spending hundreds of dollars a month I would have laughed but here I am.

Sorry, I look kinda rough in these and my septum ring is crooked but I just woke up and hadn't consumed any caffeine yet, or brushed my hair, but all of you have seen me look worse! Someone asked me why I don't really look at the camera, it's because I have an aversion to having my picture taken.I absolutely hate it and I'm much more comfortable behind the lens than in front of it so I just try not to look at it and pretend it's not there while sucking it up and taking a picture for thousands of strangers to see. I know, how I ended up making a blog full of pictures of my naked face I have no idea. One day I'm going to have to post a picture of me with makeup and stuff, I swear, I can look cute. And for some reason just now I realized I didn't take any of the other side of my face. Sorry, it looks the same, I promise, I'm not going back in there and taking more pictures of myself today.

These are the busted capillaries, from a distance they just make my skin look pink but up close you can see the individual burst capillaries. My niece actually asked me why my face was cracked  -_-   kids, ya gotta love em! 

All About Argan Oil

   So, I decided to write a post about my favorite carrier oil, argan oil. When I mention this oil to most people they have never heard of it so I figured I would shed some light on this amazing oil. I know that I mostly talk about tea tree oil and how amazing it is and how it has changed my life and face but I never really give any credit to argan oil. Also, I have had a few people write me and tell me that they have had success with the tto but their face seems oily, or greasy, or they have good results but not as

dramatic results as I have and the one difference between them and I is always the use of argan oil.

   Sure you can use coconut oil, olive oil, jojoba oil, grape-seed oil, I even stared with coconut oil because of all of the great things we know about it being anti-fungal, antibacterial and over all a wonder oil, but it just didn't work for me, not on my face. I still use coconut oil for other areas of my body and even in my hair at times, but for my face it was just to greasy and never fully absorbed and I had to blot most of it off and it left my face really shiny so I decided to try to find another oil. Truthfully I don't even remember when I heard about or how I heard about argan oil, but I ordered a tiny .5oz bottle of Josie Maran argan oil for $20 bucks, yes 20, and I loved it! It is what I call a "dry" oil if that makes any sense, when I use it my skin sucks it up in seconds and it isn't greasy at all and I can put makeup on pretty much immediately. The one issue I had with the Josie Maran argan oil that I had was price. I started doing research on argan oil and what makes a good argan oil and the main thing you want is a 100% pure COLD PRESSED argan oil. You don't want argan oil that has been diluted, and you don't want one that has used chemicals or heat to extract the oils because those will break down the healing properties of the argan oil. So after comparison shopping and started ordering my argan oil from Mt. Rose Herbs. I already used them for my herbs, I knew their products were organic, fair trade and I knew they were a good, honest, small company and I wasn't going to get ripped off. Plus I liked their prices better, 4oz for $25.00. You can find them HERE, I highly recommend them for a multitude of products from oils, to herbs, teas, tinctures, bath products, cooking stuff, containers, and much, much more.Back to the argan oil!

   I have has people ask what exactly is argan oil? Argan oil is a plant oil made from the kernels of the fruit of the argan tree that is found in Morocco. In Morocco they use argan oil for various things such as cooking, medicinal uses, and as a beauty treatment for their hair, skin and nails. It's pretty much their go to oil. Now most places when they have a product that becomes popular in western culture it tends to be detrimental to the environment and to the people in that area because people see dollar signs and don't really care about the impact of something as long as it makes money. Argan oil and argan trees are actually very different, the more popular it becomes the more positive impact it has on the land and they economy, especially for women. The Argan tree provides food, shelter and protection from desertification. The tree's deep roots help prevent desert encroachment and the canopy provides shade for other agricultural products and leaves and fruit provide food for animals. It helps landscape stability, prevents soil erosion and producing argan oil has helped protect the argan trees from being cut down. Plus goats LOVE them and I love goats. They climb into the trees to eat the fruit so you basically have goat trees. Who doesn't want goat trees?!





   Not only are argan trees good for the environment (and the goats and my amusement) it is also very good for the economy. The production of argan oil has also has has a positive socio-economic function. At present, argan oil production supports approximately 2.2 million people in the main argan oil producing region. Much of the argan oil produced today is made by a number of women's co-operatives. Employment in the co-operatives provides women with an income, which many have used to fund education for themselves or their children. It has also provided them with a degree of autonomy in a traditionally male-dominated society and has helped many become more aware of their rights. So basically my feminist side cheers with Grrl Power for argan oil! Also most argan oil, at least the good argan oil is all hand collected, cleaned, processed and pressed. No big machines, no chemicals.

Add caption

   Now lets get down to why I love this particular oil that has been called "Liquid Gold" and why I think it's more than just a carrier oil for tea tree oil. Argan oil is very high in omega-6 fatty acids and linoleic acid which can provide anti-inflammatory, anti-aging, antioxidant and moisturizing properties for the skin. It also contains omega-9 unsaturated fatty acids and vitamin A which provide high doses of antioxidants. It also contains 620mg of trocopeherols which have the same activity as vitamin E. This is twice the amount of this chemical compared to the more common olive oil. The trocopherol content of argan oil makes it a powerful antioxidant that can help to protect soft tissue by neutralizing the effects of free radicals. When applied externally it cures everything from scars, infections, split ends, acne, eczema, chicken poxs, burns and stretch marks. If you are wondering about it's internal use it's really helpful there too. Research has shown that culinary use of argan oil can help lower cholesterol, improve circulation, stabilize blood sugar, ease arthritis pain, strengthen the immune system, prevent various cancers, reduce the bodies resistance to insulin, help treat diabetes, and protect the body from cardiovascular and inflammatory disease.


If you would like to read more about it you can check out more information here, here, here, here, and here or just google. Well I hope that was informative and spreads some light on why I chose to use a pretty much unheard of argan oil and stick with it instead of going with olive or coconut oil.

Update, new oils and a few more questions answered!

   So, it's been a while but things have changed so I thought I would give update! I am still using the tea tree oil or as I now call it Melaleuca (Sounds way more impressive doesn't it) once, sometimes twice a day. If I stop using it, like if I forget it home for a week when I go out of town my face will start to regress and I will start to get break outs again and I can feel the creepy crawlies again. So basically this is a life long treatment but it's so easy and so cheap I'm okay with that.

   So now to the changes, when I first started using the tto (Melaleuca) I had just gotten some random cheap brand because I wasn't sure it if would work or not and I didn't know much about oils. Yes, it worked, if you have been following this blog or go look through it you will see that but not as well as it could have it turns out. It turns out where you get your oils, and the quality of the oils does matter.

   After I ran out of the first bottle of tto I ordered another one and I don't know what happened but it wasn't the same and didn't have the same results and my face started to break out again. I don't know if it was a different supplier, or old oil or what but it wasn't good. When that happened I started looking into how oils are made, where they come from, how they are harvested everything and I started to look for the best oils I could find and I found Young Living Essential Oils. Let me tell you they have changed my life.

   My face was good before, I was still having some breakouts but it was nothing compared to before so I was happy, my face now is flawless. I can't even believe I can say that so I am going to write it again. My face is FLAWLESS. I get comments daily now on my face but it's how beautiful my complexion in. IT'S CRAZY! I can't help but laugh a little and think in my head "If you only knew what it looked like before!"

   As I have looked more and more into Young Living oils I have started using more and more of their oils and I have started really cleaning out my medicine cabinet and replacing everything with oils. I use them for migraines, I use them to help me sleep, if I feel a cold coming on I use them and it knocks them out, I even use the lemon oil in my water after I read a article on all of the gross crap that comes with that slice of lemon in your water. If you want you can read it here, gross. I have become and oil junkie and I choose Young Living because I know that it is quality oils from seed to seal, I know where the plants are grown, how they are cared for, how they are harvested, tested, and packaged. I trust Young Living. You can purchase directly from their website but please let them know that you found them from me by entering my member number when it asks for your Sponsor ID and Enroller ID by putting in my member number which is 1365808. I'm not going to lie, if you use my number I get points that I can then use to get free oils and who doesn't like free oils. Also if you sign up as a wholesale distributor YOU a discount and instead of paying $34.00 you will pay $26.00 and get 24% discount on all products. If you sign up as a wholesale distributor you have no obligation to sell anything at all, it just provides you with the discount and the option to sell if you would like to. There are two Melaleucas on their site, I use the Melaleuca Alterifolia Essential oil.

  Okay onto a few questions that I have gotten. Yes I still use the oils, just a better brand with better results. I do not use any lotions or creams or anything else on my face. Nothing. I don't wear much makeup so at night I can just splash some water on my face and it gets rid of most of it and the oils remove the rest.

I mix my oils with another oil and not a lotion because I want to use as few things on my face as possible and I especially don't want to use chemicals I can not pronounce. So I keep it simple, Melaleuca oil (tea tree) and Argan, that's it.

I have had some people ask if I have seen a dermatologist or tell me I should see one so let me clear that up. I did, I have been to 6 different ones in 3 different states. They each put me on different expensive medications. I have taken oral medications, daily antibiotics (that can't be good), gels, creams, one doctor had his own concoction that he hand made and mixed of all of this crazy stuff I don't remember what was in it besides sulfur (It smelled) several rounds of laser treatments that cost a fortune and none if it worked, and it was all outrageously expensive. Well it worked to and extent, my face was better on it than off but never completely clear of blemishes and never not flaming red and they left me with lizard skin which was just as unattractive. So I didn't just jump into this because I didn't feel like seeing a doctor, I started doing this because what they were doing wasn't working and I could no longer afford it.

With that all being said, I will post some new pictures! Oh and I dyed my hair red, which I had done before but it never really looked that great when it matched my face ;) Also I made a flyer, feel free to share it but please don't remove my information from it.

Answering a few popular questions.

 Look out two post in one night! So I have had a couple of people wanting to know what I am doing now face wise, what my routine is and ask if I can just put it all in a nutshell so they don't have to read all of these post. So here you go, the highlights:

I use a tea tree oil shampoo and conditioner by Natures Gate that I get a Whole Foods (it's also sulfate free)

I use Dr. Bronner's tea tree bar soap for my body and sometimes my face if it's feeling extra gross (I work with dogs now so that is pretty much every day).

I no longer use the wash that I did in the beginning of this journey.

I still use the 50/50 agran oil/tea tree oil mixture. I don't use it every day, I use it about every other day and my face is still good. It is the only moisturizer I use so if my face feels dry I use it. I'm not nearly as fanatical about it as I was in the beginning, I use to carry it with me and apply it several times a day now I am really lax about it.

I didn't start out with a 50/50 mix and I don't recommend anyone do so. I started with just a little tto to a lot of argan oil. I think it was like 5 parts argan to 1 part tto and slowly upped the tto. I took me about 2 weeks to get up to the 50/50 ratio. It was strong at first and tingled but now I don't feel it, I guess your face gets use to it. I would say if your face is really burning or dry you are using to much tea tree oil and you should dilute it more. More is not always better, especially if it is causing other issues. Just because my face could handle it that quick doesn't mean everyone's can and I would hate for you to give up just because you tried to rush it.

Yes I used my oil on my lashes and eyelids but I DO NOT recommend it to anyone. It BURNS and it could cause DAMAGE to your eyes. I didn't drench my eyes in it or anything, I would rub the oil all over my face and then just brush my fingers over my eyelids and lashes. Even just that tiny leftover oil BURNED. IT BURNS your eyes. I don't want to be responsible for anyone going blind or damaging their eyes.

I ran out of the tea tree oil for about 2 weeks and my face didn't freak out or anything. I did get 1, yes 1, pustule but that was it. I'm sure if I really quit using it all together my mites would begin to over populate and my face would return to it's former glory.

When I had really dry, flaky, lizard skin (it was bad) I used raw shea butter on it and it helped a lot. I am now a huge fan of shea butter and I slather it on my whole body. I made a bunch of shea butter body butters for friends and family for Christmas and they all loved them and apparently so did anyone they shared them with and I now sell my homemade body butters. I believe in the healing powers and moisturizing powers of shea butter. lol.

I still drink coke.

Highlights of the highlights. I still use my oil mixture just not as strict about it, I use tea tree oil shampoo, conditioner and soap. Start with a very diluted tea tree oil and work your way up, if it burns or is causing other issues it's to strong. There is no need to rush it to a certain ratio. I believe even just a little tto oil is still very effective. Shea butter is amazing for dry skin.

Thanks for all the positive feedback! It's nice to know that I'm not alone and that people actually get use out of my ramblings.

No Makeup Selfie Facebook trend.

   So I guess there is some new trend on Facebook where women are suppose to take a selfie with no makeup and post it for cancer awareness. (I personally preferred the cock in a sock trend but that's just me.) I have no idea what that has to do with cancer but I was tagged in a post and....I did it! Yep, I posted a makeup free picture of myself to my facebook! Now I know I have posted a ton of makeup free pictures here so it shouldn't be a big deal, but it was for me. No one in my personal life knows about this blog...no one. So when I type these post or put up these pictures I know people are seeing them, blogger tells me over 12,000 people have seen them (CRAZY!!), but it's all strangers. I can pretend that no one is really seeing them and I won't meet anyone who does anyways and not freak out so much about posting them. But now, now I have built up the confidence to actually show the world, or my world any ways, my face makeup free. I think a lot of it has to do with having "cured" my face (it will never be cured) and part of it is having posted other pictures of my face looking horrible out there for the world to see. I think having sucked it up and posting them on here has kinda ripped off that bandaid. So thanks!

   Another interesting thing I found with the no makeup selfie trend is how many women WILL NOT DO IT. Some of the most gorgeous women I know, will not do it. There are 2 women that refuse that I have never seen without makeup and I have known them for YEARS. And the thing is they are two of the prettiest women I know. I mean it's not like they are going to wash off the makeup and suddenly become Hoggle from the Labyrinth. I know makeup can hide a lot but it's not going to change you so drastically that people will now run and hide from you if you don't wear it. As a woman who has wanted to lock herself in her house I should be more understanding, I know, but I had a reason to want to hide, I had a medical condition that effected my appearance (I didn't get to hide anyways). These women have simply been told or taught somewhere along the line that they are not pretty enough or good enough just the way they are. They feel some kind of shame or embarrassment just for someone to see them. I wish I could say that they are the exception, but in fact they are the majority of women. Most women I know would never, ever, leave their house without makeup. Ever.

   I don't know, it really made me sad how many women are not comfortable in their own skin, and with their own beauty to go bare faced. Maybe I have always had a little more confidence than I realized, but more than likely it was more of a "I don't give a F**k" than confidence lol. I was raised by women who were all about natural beauty and didn't wear a lot of makeup. Pretty wasn't pushed on me, education was. I was also lucky to date guys who always told me I looked prettier without makeup.

 I just wish more women would realize how pretty they really are and that they don't need to hide behind a mask of makeup. I hope we can instill these thoughts in generations to come. We need to raise our daughters with the confidence we instill in our sons. I mean we told men to get naked with just a sock on their cock and they all jumped on board regardless of how big, small, hairy or whatever they are. You never have a hard time talking a guy into showing off his body and getting naked no matter what he looks like, they all have an amazing amount of self confidence that more women should have. I could walk into just about any bar and tell the guys to get naked and 99% would and have no problem doing it no matter what they look like. If I was to walk into a bar and tell all the women to wash their faces probably only about 10 % would. It's sad.

   Be proud women! You are beautiful... blemishes, red faced, flushes and all! The most attractive thing a woman can wear is self confidence.

Here is my Facebook no makeup selfie in case anyone was curious.

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Super quick update!

   So I am just going to give a super quick update. My face has been really great. I haven't had a mite pustule in forever thank god, I do occasionally get a pimple, like a real pimple but that is just life. I do still have some mild redness on my face but the only thing that will help that will be lasers, I had my face zapped a few years ago and it helped and I need to do it again but it's not super bad so I am not really worrying about it yet. If I get hot or sick my face turns REALLY red, but other than that it's just a little flushed all the time. I got a job working at a doggy daycare which I love, I am still working on being a midwife. Other than that things are the same. I do plan on starting to work on other areas of myself like my weight. I'm not miserable with my body, I don't hate it, but I would like to be healthier and live a healthier life (I say this as I plan to stop at the store and grab a coke on my way to work -_-) I just really need to be healthier and losing weight wouldn't be a bad thing. I am FAR from skinny, but I'm okay with being fat, yes I said it I'm fat. So I would like to lost around 50 lbs even though according to BMI I need to lose like 70 to be on the high end. I am thinking about starting a blog to help me be accountable but we will see. Anyways back to the face, here are some pictures I just took. Still doing argan and tea tree oil, and occasionally if I get a zit a friend had some proactive stuff she didn't use anymore and I will use it as a spot treatment and it helps clear it up faster. It's still wierd to run my hands across my face and for it to be smooth. Especially since my nervous tick use to be picking (gross, I know). Okay off to the pictures! And yes I know for some reason I am giving major duck face, I have no excuse for it, I didn't even realize I was doing it. You can see I had a pimple right below the corner of my mouth but it's gone and healing now. At this moment I don't have a single pimple or bump, just healing remains. It blows my mind still.